Neeh...Do-Over!

Oh, for fuck's sake:

Under fire for losing track of weapons that turned up at crime scenes along the Southwest border, the Justice Department has taken the extraordinary step of formally withdrawing an inaccurate letter about the episode that it sent to Congress earlier this year.

Wow, wouldn't it be nice to be one of the Untouchables, to be able to whine "do-over!" in the middle of an ongoing investigation...to be able, when confronted with massive evidence of actual criminal wrongdoing (and literal proof of perjury), to simply "withdraw" your earlier testimony and offer up a different story?

Shit, the jokes just line themselves up, don't they?

• Maxwell Smart:  "Would you believe..."
• Groucho Marx:  "Those are my principles.  If you don't like them, I have others."
• Mark Twain:  "The truth is the most valuable thing we have.  Let us by all means economize it."
• The jailers of Yellowbeard, when at the end of the latter's prison sentence he asked if he would be set free:  "Well, yes...or, rather, no.  You see, when we sent you to jail twenty years ago, we really didn't expect you to live that long."
• The Grim Reaper, when asked if the previous deal (best two out of three) would now have to be the best three out of five:  "Damn right!"
• Garden-variety politicians:  "It depends on what the meaning of the word 'is' is."

(Please feel free to submit others if you like.  The pickins is rich.)


And yet this is inevitable, isn't it?  It comes right along with that "legitimate monopoly on force" deal with the devil.  These are, after all, the same people who have been manufacturing their own (murderous) reality to achieve their political goals;  it should not surprise us that they would also move to manufacture their own exoneration within a legal system that, hell, they wholly own anyway.

Still, jeez, the sheer chutzpah is absolutely astounding.  I hope every juror in America sees this play for what it is.  It can only erode faith in the system, and at least that's something.

Don't worry, guys.  We get your damn message.

Here's one in return:

Seriously.


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* Hat tip to Vanderboegh.